Unfiltered caused some rage to build up in me, so just be warned I might get kind of ranty here! Also, for lovers of all things lit and horror, I'm written a blog post on immortality in literature, and whether it's a blessing or a curse (spoiler alert: for me, immortality will always fall under the horror genre). Check it out at cordeliakelly.
Listen to: Picture Perfect, Sedona
Lily is crazy smart and awesome and as we watch her through the day, we see she’s confident and so full of potential. But, like many teenage girls, she’s also obsessed with selfies and influencers, judging her self-worth based on her looks. She hates her nose, and her glasses, and sometimes wishes she wasn’t a nerd. She confesses to her equally nerdy friend that she wants to be hot, not smart, just once, and go to a party with cute boys. As she says, she wants to be just a touch closer to perfect.
A new crazy-hot teacher breezes into the art class, being all awesome and beautiful as she tells them all to just paint something. Lily’s crush approaches her and she gets her hopes up as he tells her about this party he’s having … and he wants her to tutor him because if he fails his upcoming test, his parents will make him cancel. Lily is crushed that he only sees her as a nerd.
New hot teacher overhears, and tells Lily that it’s hard being pretty too. Okay, no one asked you, hot lady, and I’m offended for Lily that she’s getting involved. Ooh, but now she’s sharing this awesome new beauty app that’s invite-only and I’m realizing that hot teacher is in fact very, very sketchy.
Lily is skeptical, but the beauty app works. As in, it changes her actual face. So she gives herself the nose job of her dream and her face is now perfect.
When she comes to school the next day, she’s just like one of the cute girls. (Except, let’s just get into this here right now: she could have always worn cute clothes and like, brushed her hair. Self-grooming is okay. Nerds don’t have to only wear oversized flannel.) But whatever, changing her nose and putting on makeup has allowed her to become a changed person.
Unfortunately, she’s actually a changed person, because as she’s talking to her very smart friend, it’s clear she’s gotten dumber. She looks at the app, that’s flashing a warning sign that side effects include permanent changes in personality.
Except, except, being pretty, wearing make-up or clothes that you like doesn’t actually make you dumb. It’s not an either/or concept, and I’m not loving that this is how it’s being portrayed. It’s a little heavy-handed.
So she ditches her sweet friend to go hang with the popular girls who are into her now that she’s wearing contacts and a crop top. And now she’s chatting with her crush and her real friend is genuinely crushed. The popular girls are kind of mean, though, and they tell Lily she couldn’t land her crush and needed to manage her expectations.
So Lily takes things even further with the app until she doesn’t even look like herself anymore. She also turns into a flaky bitch. She completely fails at the quiz bowl she’d been studying before she got popular, and her friend calls her basic. She will not be accepting calls anymore.
But, things are going Lily’s way because her crush invites her to his party, and I cannot even handle her lips. How does one even speak out of those? I also can’t handle her new, seriously mean attitude. She’s so shallow even her crush can’t handle her, so she frantically goes to upgrade her face again. But she goes too far. She’s turned into one of those weird plastic surgery cat-ladies, it’s a horrifying mess. The whole party goes silent at her face.
She runs to the hot teacher’s house, the one that got her into this hot mess in the first place. It’s weirdly empty and ominous, so obviously she just lets herself in. Hanging in the room are mirrors, where living people are trapped.
Hot teacher finds her there and gets mad. By now we all know she’s a witch (but not an adorable one) and explains that the people’s spirits are trapped there. They traded their souls to be pretty, because when they have the choice, people will choose outer beauty over inner beauty every time. And she calls Lily out for being shallow.
Lily gets mad and starts smashing the mirrors, realizing that it hurts the witch. She smashes all the mirrors and the souls are released. The witch turns old and ugly, and Lily gets her old face and her old personality back.
First stop, Lily makes up with her friend, who at first plays she’ll never forgive her, but takes her back readily enough. And they walk away with the knowledge that inner beauty is the best. But also apparently that nerds must never think of their appearance because we are only allowed to have one dominant personality trait, and if you want to be smart, that’s it.
Let me finish my rant that wearing makeup doesn’t make women evil? And that wanting to look your best doesn’t actually detract from your other qualities? I get not overdoing it, I get not being swayed by influencers and apps that make it seem like we should all be perfect, but for me, Unfiltered did not hit that mark. 3 hot lips out of 7.
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